Join Us Every Friday #NovConv |
To be a little different from the usual
'meet the author'
'meet the author'
let's meet a
character -
or in today's case several characters... from
character -
or in today's case several characters... from
Health warning: you may find yourself amused ...
The Green Room at Novel Conversations (#NovConv) is especially crowded today ...
Emily (“Unpredictable Factors in Human Obedience”):
(setting down the Earl Grey tea provided by the
organizers) Why are there so many characters here? I thought this Novel
Conversation with Helen Hollick was my chance at vindication. I’m sure readers
get a mistaken impression of me in my story.
Miriam (“Threads Woven”): Everyone from all the stories in Unpredictable
Worlds is here, more than 120 of us. We don’t want
to overwhelm the interviewer, so why don’t I do it? I’m feeling creative now, painting
new portraits all the time.
George (“Threads Woven”): (kissing Miriam’s cheek) And she took a creative writing course at the
community college.
Herbert (“A Disastrous Marriage”): My beautiful wife is the best writer I know. If anyone understands
Jessica Knauss—our author—or the writing process, it’s her.
Raúl (“Alternativa” and “El Novillero”): But Unpredictable Worlds has
just been released in Spanish translation as Mundos impredecibles. I’m
sure Helen will ask about what that process was like, so she should interview
me. I’m the only one who understands Spanish here.
Fran (“What She Lacked”): That’s not true. Elena from your stories is
looking at you out of the corner of her eye, right beside you. The kids from
“True Superstition” are here, and Lucinda from “The Consequences of Neglect,”
and I’m pretty sure my twin, Dulcy, picked up Spanish while she was missing.
Suzanne (“Not Extinct Yet”): I’ve come all the
way from an alternate world in which animals talk. I daresay Helen would find
that more interesting than any foreign language. And I can show how to save the
rhinos in this world by explaining how we did it in mine.
Allie (“Rhinoceros Dreams”): If it’s rhinos you
want, I should do the interview. I turned into a white rhino and roamed South
Africa for about six weeks!
Deacon Tucker (“Rhinoceros Dreams”): That was a
metaphor.
Allie (“Rhinoceros Dreams”): It was literal! I
turned into a rhino, and my human husband may not be my son’s father!
Robert (“Rhinoceros Dreams”): (balks)
Unnamed narrator (“Stairs
to the Beach”): (mumbling)
These weirdos are about to self-destruct. I’ll have the interview all to myself
soon enough.
Dolores (“The Residents of
the Inn”): (to
Allie) Even if you did turn into a rhino, you’re just a lady now. But don’t
mind me. I’m only still a spider!
Emily (“Unpredictable Factors in Human Obedience”):
(stepping on Dolores) Helen is sure to ask about
our author’s other books. I can talk about the urban fantasy Awash in Talent because although
we’re not the same character, we’re both awesome young ladies named Emily.
Pedantic narrator (“Bones of a Story”): You’re unreliable narrators, both of you Emilies. Helen can’t believe
anything you say. I should do the interview because I can tell Helen that
Jessica Knauss also writes historical fiction set in medieval Spain and is now
working on a science fiction romance of otherworldly imagination. And when
Helen asks how readers can help authors, I’ll talk about leaving reviews,
recommending books to friends, and doing interviews like this one it looks like
we’d all kill each other to be a part of.
Unnamed narrator (“Stairs
to the Beach”): (clapping
her hands) Okay, everyone! The production assistant tells me the characters who
want to do the interview should wait in the room behind that door. Those
characters who don’t want to be interviewed can stay right here and will be
returned to Unpredictable Worlds shortly.
Amy (“Justine”): Production assistant? I didn’t see
any production assistant.
Unnamed narrator
(“Stairs to the Beach”) pushes everyone through an unmarked door, where wolves (“Not the Taste
Experience We Were Looking For”) growl. They tear the characters to pieces and nudge their remains into a
bottomless pit.
Unnamed narrator dusts
off her blouse and clasps her hands in satisfaction.
Real Production Assistant: Is there only one of you? I
thought there were a lot of characters in Jessica Knauss’s Unpredictable
Worlds. If it’s just going to be you, Helen is ready to have a Novel
Conversation. Please come this way...
[The assistant shows Unnamed Narrator into the studio and to a seat. Helen Looks up smiles,]
Hello, I’m Helen, host of Novel Conversations here on #NovConv, please do make yourself comfortable. We're not recording yet, that red light to your left will go on when we're live. Would you like a drink or anything? I'll ask my assistant, to get you something, and please don't worry about rattling tea cups or chinking glass, it all adds to the atmosphere. Right, there's just a couple of things I have to do and then we'll start ...
Later, Helen to her assistant: "Well that was different! I thought Jessica was sending us several of her characters to interview? Oh well, never mind. Let's finish off that bottle of wine - that was quite an interview! Oh, and did Jessica send us her links to add?"
CONNECT
WITH Jessica Knauss
Unpredictable
Worlds
EXCERPT
You can find links to four of the published stories from Unpredictable
Worlds on this page. https://www.jessicaknauss.com/unpredictable-worlds-stories/
Para dos fragmentos interesantísimos de Mundos
impredecibles y enlaces a todos los puntos de venta (versión en tapa blanda
para mediados de 2020), visita esta página.
On an Amazon near you http://viewauthor.at/HelenHollick |
Laughed my socks off! Never, ever seen an interview like that - congratulations to Helen and Jessica for combining to make this 'interview' so entertaining!
ReplyDeleteI loved, loved, loved this! So clever and funny. And yes, I am off to look up Jessica's books now...
ReplyDeleteIt's good isn't it!
ReplyDeleteI always said, one can never have too much wine. Especially when it produces such hilarious results. Still laughing. Hic...
ReplyDelete