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Well
he’ll never get that in there. That shed is rusted shut. And it’s no good
looking at me; if I agree to take it in, I’ll have to carry it back to my house
and I’ve just locked up and got going. I might only live next door, but I can do
without the palaver. I don’t know why No 17 ever orders anything anyway, it’s
not like he’s ever in. He comes home from work, or whatever it is he does all
day and then he goes out until really late. I hear his front door slam. Helen
says it’s only because I’m a light sleeper and that I should expect it at my
age, but I never was a light sleeper when her father was alive. And then just
as I get back to sleep I hear him go out again. When Barbara down the road had
some jewellery go missing I knew it was him. Why else does he sneak about so
late at night, and then go straight out again? Turns out that it wasn’t him,
after all, that took the jewellery, but I still don’t want him knocking on my
door to get his parcel, not after I told the police I thought it was him.
And now look at him at 25. Outside smoking
again. He’s always lurking when he should be at college. Or getting himself a
job now he’s left school. Bob always used to say that all he needed was a
baseball cap to complete the look. I used to laugh but now it’s not funny when
I walk past on my own. Helen said that he has some sort of ‘special needs’ and
she says that if I ever looked I would see the community bus that takes him to
the centre three days a week, but I can’t see if I’m inside. These days I have
my chair pointing straight at the telly. No point in turning it round, not now
there’s only me. Apparently the lad has a job delivering the free paper and as
soon as Helen told me that, I knew who it was who kicked all the bins over the
other evening. Bob would have sorted him out but I had to phone the police.
Oh, that paving slab nearly got me again.
It bothers me now that I don’t have Bob’s arm to steady me.
Now what on earth has No29 put in her
window? Some ghastly ceramic elephant is it? Mrs Knick-Knacker must spend her
life dusting all those hideous ornaments. Best thing I ever did, getting rid of
all my tat. Helen said I should have kept some of the statuettes and trophies
and old teddies, but I don’t have loads of grandchildren; she seemed a bit hurt
by that remark but I’m only speaking the truth, and in any case it just
reminded me of Bob and who wants to be constantly reminded? At least it will be
easier for her when she has to clear the house out when I’m gone. Mrs
Knick-Knacker is just being selfish, hanging onto all her stuff. I probably
should know her name but I don’t recall. I do remember when she came out and
spoke to me and asked my name. I hate that. Put me in a certain age bracket
that did, always has.
“Shirley? Oh, was you named after Shirley
Temple then?”
And I said, like I always do, “She’s not
the only famous Shirley.”
And I got, “Can you sing, then, like Shirley
Bassey?”
Common woman, with all her junk shop china
and her awful grammar. Helen thought she was just being friendly but I’m not
convinced. Anyway even if we are pretty much the same age, doesn’t mean we have
to be friends. Why do people think that all old folk are the same? And she
hasn’t been so keen to be friendly since I reported her for poisoning those
cats. Helen says that just because she has a nice garden and no cats of her own
doesn’t mean she hates everybody else’s but it made sense to me.
Bother, here’s that nosy one from 31. She’s
seen me staring. I can’t even pretend that I’ve stopped to do up a shoelace. Damn
these Velcro shoes; they’re like those trainers that mums buy their children
because they’re too lazy to teach them to tie their laces. Old Lady Shoes, they
are, and I hate them. Once, my ankles weren’t so swollen. Once they took me
down the track half a second slower than the GB record. Now a trip to the
village takes most of the day.
“Can you take 17’s parcel in, Shirl? I
would but we’re off to Prestatyn for the weekend.”
“Sorry, I can’t. Got to get to the Post
Office before it shuts.” I’m not going to look behind, I’m just going to keep
walking. Honestly, time was when you respected your elders. ‘Shirl’ indeed. In
my day we called people Mr and Mrs Such-and-Such. I’m Mrs Harris and she knows
it. I remember when Marjorie and Ronald lived there. Before we got friendly we
always called each other by our titles, and they were Colonel and Mrs to
everyone else even after we formed a Bridge four.
Thank goodness there’s no-one in at
41. I don’t understand a word he says. He came out and shouted at me last week
and I found it rather upsetting. He wouldn’t have done that if Bob had been
with me. Helen thinks he works at the hospital but that’s only because her
friend’s husband thinks he saw him there. Once upon a time everyone would
introduce themselves when they moved in but honestly what would be the point
when we can’t understand what this chap says? Besides, I’m not one for gossip
so I’m not going to guess what he does for work, and if he was shouting at me
for reporting him then he should be ashamed of himself for frightening an old
lady. I was only doing what I thought was right. Bob always made sure that the
tax disc on our car was up to date. If people want to be respected as citizens,
they need to abide by the law and make sure their cars are legal. There was a time
when nobody on the street would have stood by while a woman on her own was
harangued like that, but I bet half of them don’t even know that I live on this
street. I certainly don’t know half of them.
Still, there is a glimmer of hope. I noticed
that there is a new couple over the road at 32. They never park their car in
the garage and I bet that’s because it’s crammed full of lovely toys for the
children. They must take them to the park though, because you never see the
kids playing in the street. I like the idea of families moving back into the
area, as long as the children are well-behaved. When Helen and Mark were little
there were always kids playing in the gardens and we mums were in and out of
each other’s houses all the time. Now the street is full of old people. Them,
and new folk that I don’t know. And all the gardens have water features and
decking and those annoying wind chimes. It seems to have got worse since Bob
died. Helen says it hasn’t, it’s just that I notice it more. But she doesn’t
see it; she only visits once a month now.
Well,
that would have taken less time if that silly woman had got all the right forms
ready before she went and held up the whole Post Office queue. It’s all very
well getting your passport forms checked but not if it holds up the rest of the
customers. Who needs to travel abroad anyway? Bournemouth
always suited Bob and me well enough. And she was parked on a double yellow and
that made me even later because then I had to wait around for the traffic
warden so I could let him know. I don’t know what folk would do if there
weren’t still some law-abiding citizens to maintain standards. And what am I
supposed to do with these new self-sticking stamps? Young folk don’t understand
that we seniors like to peel off stamps from envelopes if they haven’t been
franked, and then re-use them. They call it fraud; we used to call it thrift.
Apparently not many people send letters these days anyway. Seems like I’m not
‘people’ any more. And now that’s the church clock chiming 12. Honestly, my
poor little Gertie will be starving. She might be only a budgie but she still
needs my attention. Hello, what’s going on here? This doesn’t look quite right;
I should probably investigate…
“If
I could just ask you a few questions, I know it’s distressing. Did she have any
enemies? Anyone who would have reason to hurt her?”
“She kept herself to herself, I
suppose, always stayed on her side of the street. There’s a daughter I think
and someone once saw a son, but I never have. No-one on this side really knew
her. Erm, Barbara could probably tell you more. Barbara?”
“Oh I’ll tell you. Shirley Harris. Reported
everyone on her side of the street to the police for one thing or another over
the years. Well, since Bob died, anyway.”
“Shirley Harris, you say?”
“Yes. Busybody, but not in a nasty way, I
don’t think. More that she got scared, being on her own. Ah there you are. Just
saying Shirley love, you’d be the one to ask if anything out of the ordinary
had been going on.”
“Yes, I heard you.” I was only just behind
you and I’m not deaf, just slower than I was. Fussy Barbara who has to call
everyone ‘love’ Imagine anyone thinking Barbara would know what goes on round
here. She even forgot that she took her jewellery to Peter Dodds in town for cleaning
and then I had to report it stolen. She made me look rather silly. “What’s been
going on, Officer?”
“Oh Shirley love, the woman at 32’s been
murdered. They found the body in the garage and there’s no sign of the husband.
They think she’s been lying there for weeks.”
Dear God almighty. I’m going to have to put
my bags down because my hands have suddenly gone all sweaty. Here come the
palpitations again. It’s like my heart is knocking to be let out. I’m not going
to ask to lean on anyone’s arm, but I do feel giddy. How could such an awful
thing happen here on our road?
“Can you describe the husband for us
Madam?”
‘Madam’, I like that; nice manners. “Well
he’s, he’s er…” No, I can’t describe him can I? Because I never noticed him. I
didn’t think that a young family would pose any kind of problem for the street
and I thought Bob would probably have liked them. I was too busy looking for
trouble on my own side of the street. Well, at least this will make Helen check
on me more often. And maybe Mark might… well, one can always hope. “Barbara?
We’ve all had a shock; come into mine for a nice cup of tea and let’s discuss
setting up a Neighbourhood Watch scheme.”
I’ll be in charge, obviously.
© Annie Whitehead
website anniewhiteheadauthor.co.uk
On an Amazon near you http://viewauthor.at/HelenHollick |
Brilliant! I loved it!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much :-)
DeleteGlorious|!! I think we've all known a Shirley Harris at one time or another, but you have captured her (old fashioned) values so well. Well done!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Richard! :-)
DeleteLoved this story Annie!
ReplyDeleteThank you! :-)
DeleteGoodness, not a lot to like about Shirley, is there?! I know we're intended to see her loneliness and sympathise, but she really isn't very likable.... but so perfectly drawn, so familiar, as Richard said, we've all known a Shirley.
ReplyDeleteThere's a reason she's like she is, but it's not an excuse, really is it?!
DeleteFirst, I shook. Then, I shuddered. I live in a retirement resort with those old people. I am retired myself and must take heed not to be "a Shirley." Fun story, Annie, and so true in many cases.
ReplyDeleteNow, what's going on out there? My window is well situated as I sit at the computer...
Lol Inge - make sure to stay on your own side of the street...! :-)
DeleteVery perceptive, and I might even confess to early onset curtain twitching myself these lockdown days, but not like this, oh no. Great story!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much! :-)
Delete