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Frankfurt October 1938
Gustav was losing feeling in his left arm, but he didn’t want to disturb Gretel. He always loved listening to her snore. She denied she snored, but he knew better. It wasn’t particularly loud, but occasionally, she would snort, which always made him laugh. He sometimes wondered if he would ever be able to sleep through the night with her snoring. He assumed he would get used to it once they were able to spend the night together, after they were married. He looked over at the clock. It was nearly 10:00. He needed to get up before Gretel’s parents came home. They had gone to the opera and then to dinner at friends. That usually involved some after-dinner drinking, which usually meant they would be home late. Gustav had never met anyone who drank like Gretel’s parents. His family never really drank, and neither did his friends. Gustav pulled his arm out from under her head, careful not to wake Gretel.
He got up from the bed, walked over to the chair, and sat down. Looking over at Gretel, he knew he had to sketch her. It might have been the light streaming in through the window or the way her golden curls rested across her face. But at that moment, she looked perfect to him. He found a pencil on her dresser and a piece of scrap paper and began to sketch. After a few minutes, Gretel began to stir. Gustav stopped sketching.
“Hello, sleeping beauty. Did you have a nice nap?”
“I did. What time is it?”
“It’s a little after ten. I need to get dressed and out of the apartment before you parents get home.”
“Don’t worry about them. They’re out with the Strausses. Once my father and Herr Strauss start drinking, there’s no stopping them. Why don’t you come back to bed for another snuggle.”
“You know I would like nothing more than another snuggle. But it’s late, and I want to avoid seeing your parents on the way out. Plus, a Jew walking the streets at ten p.m. is different than a Jew walking the streets at midnight. We still need to be careful. After all, you and I are breaking the law. In fact, I never even jaywalked before I met you. My cousins always teased me that I was such a rule follower. And now I could go to prison for years. You’re a terrible influence on me, bringing me into a life of crime.”
“Yes, your shiksa girlfriend corrupting you. How can I ever forgive myself?”
Gustav looked over at Gretel. She really was beautiful. It was all he could do not to return to her. But he really needed to go, to keep them both safe. “There’s nothing I would like to do more than to stay with you tonight and every night. But we both know I need to leave. But remember, we’re having dinner tomorrow night at my friend Leo’s apartment. I’m cooking, so maybe you’ll want to eat something before you get there.”
“Remind me – have you ever cooked in your life?” She giggled, then said, “But don’t worry. I’ll bring plenty of dessert.”
Gustav gave her the sketch and a quick kiss. He knew a longer kiss would cause him staying longer and he really needed to leave.
“When did you do this? While I was sleeping? It’s beautiful.”
“You are beautiful.”
“Gustav, you are so talented. Just a pencil and a scrap of paper and you did this.”
Gustav said nothing in response, but simply
smiled at Gretel.
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Thank you so much for hosting Bonnie Suchman today, with an intriguing excerpt from her evocative novel, What Remains is Hope.
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